Shamelessly stolen from Marko...

Who stole it from Tam, who stole it from someone else...


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Odd... only one mocha today.

And four Cokes...

And some chocolate...

*twitch*

Da Cuss o Meter

Heh... found via Tam, who got it from Marko (both in the blogroll)...


Created by OnePlusYou - Free Online Dating


Wow... who fucking knew?

Ok folks... time to step up.

Hey everyone!

A lil' while ago, I posted this gem. It's been picked up by AD, and hopefully spread a bit farther.

This goes WAY beyond some cash to help the kids: this would qualify as national exposure for BACA during Child Abuse Awareness Month.

Go. Vote. Pass it on to your friends and family!

A Just and Sane World

Law Dog hits one out of the park with this post.

I know most of my readers have probably already read it. But it needs to be spread far and wide.

To add insult to injury, the perp shares my fucking last name. Never thought someone could make me ashamed of being a Hilton.

ego massage should be done with a chain mace

Via Bitter at the Bitch Girls, we get this.

To soothe the bruised egos of educators and children in lackluster schools, Massachusetts officials are now pushing for kinder, gentler euphemisms for failure.

Now, I don't mean to go on a rant here. But if someone is failing at whatever their job is, you say "Hey: you're failing". If I'm not selling ad space, i expect a call from my boss pointing out that I'm not succeeding at my job. If this state's BACA chapters get way out of line, I expect a call from National asking what the problem is. What I do NOT expect (and would piss me off) would be either one coming up with some sugar-coated term for "failure".

Here's a REALLY novel idea: when one of these schools isn't performing up to snuff, call 'em on it. Identify what the problems are, and attack those problems.

Oh hey... looks like one of the students, who sits on the board, had that idea:

Zachary Tsetsos, a senior at Oxford High School and the only student on the board, said he finds the debate frivolous.

"Why are we spending time on this?," said the 17-year-old. "I don't want to tiptoe around the issue. I'm not concerned about what title we give these schools. Let's work on fixing them."

Want to massage the tender egos of failing students, and the teachers/administrators who are partly responsible? Haw about using a chain mace, or a hickory switch, or any of a number of similar "motivational tools" that have proven effective over the years.

Ye gawds... and these are the folks shaping the minds of future leaders?

The things you see overseas...

This post by Guitargirl RN reminded me of a couple Thailand stories...

First off was the girl I kept company with while there on liberty. We had gone back to her place, and she gave me the quick tour... mentioning that I "don't want to open that door". What I saw was similar to the picture at the above post...

A few nights later, we're in a bar. I stumble my way to the head, and plant myself in front of one of the urinals. Turning to my right, I see a cockroach, standing at the next urinal. He smiles and says "Hey".

I gave up drinking for a LONG time after that.

what... y'all expected something serious?

requiem

Just got word that one of my old gaming buddies died.

Donnie was a former SEAL, and a hell of a guy. I wasn't as close to him as some others (my roomie is basically useless at the moment: Don was part friend part father figure to him). Crazy, as one might expect, but a fun crazy.

Looks like the afterlife just got another person to guard the walls (not to mention chase the women, and otherwise raise Caine). He'll be sorely missed.

How can I help?

I get asked that question alot, when folks see my patch: "That's a great idea! How can i help out?". Of course, they usually don't stick around when they find out it's actual work.

Now, we have a way y'all can help a Chapter without doing much of anything.

1. Go to www.ktbs.com
2. Type in keyword "give" (upper right side of page)
3. Search the List of non-profits registered for the competition for "BACA, River Cities Chapter"
4. To "vote" for us, you just post a favorable comment about us.
5. The 5 charities with the most comments will be finalists and everyone will get to vote again, but only between these 5 charities.

Now, you have to register with their site, but it isn't all that difficult.

Here's the link direct to the river Cities Chapter entry. Go ahead, hit it, and hit it hard...

News of the sick & perverted

Ran across this...

I have to ask... how can someone look at a DOG and become sexually aroused? Worse yet, it's not some fruffy dog, but a rottweiler.

I mean, seriously: isn't that right up there with molesting grizzlies, tigers, or wolverines?

Here's one to make you feel silly

From the bane of my existence Skip, we get this.

Check it out. Let me know how many of y'all

a) get the count right

b) miss the lil' extra bit

Steering HMS Privateer into the rocks

But only fer a sec.

Heller oral arguments are less than a week away. This has a chance of being one of THE most important USSC decisions handed down in our lifetime.

Anybody want to take odds of them offering a decision that stands up like overcooked noodles?


Ok... back for open waters for this pirate (for now)...

Worth thousands of words

I'd say this picture speaks for itself (shamelessly stolen from Boots and Sabres:



Can we please have less nanny BS, now?

"Methadonians"

Ok, try this: type "methadone" into the search function of blogger. Read some of what you find.

Don't worry, I'll still be here. Go. Read.


Ok... got all that?

For those who need it Spoon fed: GuitarGirlRN posted something about a man on methadone, who was stealing stuff out of his ER room. In said post, she called the thief a "methadonian". And she's come under fire for it.

I didn't read ALL the comments, but here are a couple choice ones:

Chava: "Your description of your patient as a "Methadonian" is rude and perpetuates the stigma that patients on methadone have to live with each and every day of their lives"

Anonymous: "Methadone patients do NOT get a high or euphoria off their medication"

Enylear (posted as Anonymous): "And was it an emergency? Yeah, you walk a day in our shoes without a dise and then tell me it wasnt an emergency. It is very much an emergent situation when we arent able to get our prescribed dose. Where do you go for that?"

Just so y'all understand: my roomie Ray is on methadone for chronic back pain (as in, she has a fused fucking spine). I mentioned the term "methadonian" to her, and she giggled at it.

Regarding the "you can't get high": Ray was on a bigger dose at first. Barred from work for a week, while her system adjusted to this new chemical in her system. There were a couple times we caught her sitting there drooling on herself (literally). She cut her dose herself, because she didn't like "being high all the time".

Oh... Enylear? Ray goes without her dose quite often: we'll all be out, and she won't be able to take it (usually because she's forgotten her drugs). It's actually gotten to the point where I'll probably be carrying a couple doses for her. But she doesn't go screaming to the ER. She soldiers the fuck on, until she can get home (given the stuff we do with BACA, that might be a couple days).

Now, I know everyone's different, and reacts to different stimuli in different ways. But this bullshit of of jumping on someone for venting on their own fucking blog is just WAY too far out there.

What's next: someone going to jump me for expressing exasperation at mothers during the preliminary contact call and interview for BACA?

Get a life, people. If you don't like what someone says in their corner of the intarwebz, then don't fucking go there!

Adding to the blogroll...

And another addition to the blogroll: y'all need to head over and check out the Cave Troll.

Nice guy, some funny stuff, and a fairly good writer.

BTW: I've heard rumors that BACA is getting prepped to open in SA. Just sos ya know... ;)

Adventures in Cat/Vet interactions

This post over at Atomic Nerds reminded me of one of the cats that have had me over the years.

I was working for dad, and we one day saw this TINY ball of grey fur come wandering down the sidewalk. That particular day, dad had tossed some chicken bones outside (for whatever feral cat might chance by), and one of the shop cats (Spike: 25 lbs of phenomenal feline power with a itty-bitty-kitty voice) was sunning himself. Anyway, this lil' ball of fluff wanders along, smells the bones, and beelines: she didn't notice Spike until she was already gnawing, at which point she did the "puff up an' look mean" trick.

Spike's response, as near as we could tell, was to think "Junior, I could eat you"

Well, dad hears this growling, and investigates. Being the cold-hearted animal hater he is, he immediately decides we have to try and catch the lil' bugger, so it has a chance of survival.

Que blown workday as we lower the overhead door to JUST enough for a kitten, set out something that smells good, and lay in wait. For three hours. Before calling it a day, and heading home.

Itty-Bitty Kitty: 1
Adult Male Humans: 0

Next day, I arrive, and dad bellows "Get through the door quick! Don't want him getting away!". Like I said: animal hater.

Not good with sexual differentiation, either.

We got HER tamed down a bit (amazing what you can do with things like chicken, roast beef, and turkey). At first, we christened her "Snowball" ("She looks like a Chicago snowball"). There was the memorable day that we lost another hour of productivity, because she didn't head for the back room when we started the machines after lunch (Itty-Bitty Kitty: 2, Adult Male Humans: 0). But we noticed that she, well... had an oil leak.

Not sure how else to describe it: she marked her territory the same way an old Harley does: she'd stop for a bit, sit down, and leave a small black puddle. This requires immediate professional attention (especially since I'm not sure a: where the dipstick is on a cat, b: what the capacity is, nor c: how to locate the drain plug). So... off to the vet!

Let's not discuss trying to catch her to TAKE her to the vet (Itty-Bitty Kitty: 3, Adult Male Humans: 0).

We get her to the vet, and everything goes fine: somehow, the vet fixed the leak, and got her cleaned up. We found out she was white.

Couldn't spend all that time and money, then stick her back in that dingy shop, so Spoon and I took her in. After the first night, we renamed her. Went something like this:

Itty-Bitty Kitty: "Love me!"
Me: "OK" *picks up cat, begins rubbing*
IBK: "Ok, that's enough now" *proceeds to remove arm at the shoulder*

I looked at Spoon and, between the screams, casually mention "she's a succubus! She lures you in with her feminine charms, then tries to eat you!". And the name stuck: Succubus, or Suki for short.

Fast forward several weeks.

We had a heat wave hit, and a house with ZERO AC. The rest of the menagerie had the sense to head for the basement (I think the python was overheard muttering about "damned humidity"). But not Suki.

Que frantic run for the vet, with a listless and slack kitty. I thought for sure I was going to be digging a grave.

We get to the vet, and the techs all smile "Oh... it's Snowball!". I suddenly realize that things are going to go rodeo.

"No, her name's Suki. Short for Succubus". I even explain the story, and show them the stitches from re-attaching the arm.

They scoff. Silly humans.

I'd like to take a minute, and explain something about this vet: she's GOOD. Deals with all KINDS of "problem animals". I'm pretty sure that, if I had a rabid wolverine that I wanted treated, she'd deal with it and never bat an eye.

The only phrase I hear from the exam room is "We'll just draw some blood real quick". This was followed by the sound of Hell's Gates being thrown open...

They had scoffed. Silly humans.

When it was all said and done, it took three techs to draw blood on a cat that would JUST overflow my cupped hands. I mean, I have pistols that weigh more than this cat did. Three techs.

When they came out, the one girl just looked at me mournfully, muttering something about rabid wolverines. The vet herself apologized for doubting my rename.


She died a few years later. Near as we can tell, she had been weaned (or rather, abandoned) WAY too early, causing problems in her digestive tract. When she got sick that last time, we took her to a different vet. Mom-in-law visited her the next day (Suki let her KNOW what she thought of being abandoned there), and she seemed to be improving. That night, she died.

Still miss her. DO appreciate getting to keep all my limbs though.

Here's Suki (we also dubbed her the Sock Monster: with her coloring, she could completely disappear into a dryer full of socks).

Politics, Liberty, and Safety

"Poly", meaning "many"
and "Tic", meaning "small blood-sucking creature"

So... we're down to a choice between McCain and Hilbama*. Oh, hooray.

I can be raped by a 12 foot pole, or... raped by a 12 foot pole with lube.

Nice choice.

Loads of MUCH better writers are weighing in one the "big choice" we have coming in November. Some are saying "Vote for the lesser evil", some are saying "we're getting the shaft either way".

I fall into the latter category. And I have some VERY good company.

Both sides want me to trade my Liberty for perceived safety. I think Ole Ben had the right idea there: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

"Liberty" and "Safety" can easily be seen as mutually exclusive concepts. "Liberty" (or, better, "Freedom") only truly exists where you can enter into potentially dangerous situations. In order to be "Safe", you MUST give up basic freedoms: most of the bill of rights is full of "dangerous" things. And the tyrants always tells us that, by sacrificing these freedoms, we'll be "safer".

I don't know about those reading this blog. Me? I prefer to have my guns, be able to say whatever the hell I want, ride my motorcycle naked, and accept the danger my freedom brings me. I don't ask for the government to take care of me should my choices cause me problems, and in return all I ask is to be left alone to live my life as I see fit.

Apparently, that is actually too much to ask.

* I'm not being "snarky" here. At this point, either Hillary or Obama could win the Socialism Left candidacy
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When I voted the other day in the primary, I voted for Fred. Yes, he had already left the race. I don't care: he at least came close to representing what I believe.

In November, I'm not sure how I'll vote: might just write Fred in again. I will NOT, however, vote for "Socialism Left" nor "Socialism Right". Yes, I know the rhetoric: "If you don't vote for the Republicans, the evil Democrats will take your guns!".

Wow... some REALLY poor observers we have out there.

In the 2000 election circus, the Dems had a commercial. Don't know who the yahoo on the screen was, but his comment was telling: "If George W Bush wins the election, the NRA will have an office in the White House". Didn't really help the Dem bid for the Presidency.

But LOTS of people missed the real importance. G W Bush DID win the election. And what was that office used for? Ordering pizza?

Either side wants my vote, they need to offer something more than lip service. Something more than flirting. I need to be "courted" in a somewhat tangible way.

Start returning my freedoms. Then, maybe, we'll talk.

Roomies say the darndedist things...

Anyone that actually knows me, knows I tend to take part in rather... odd... games. One that's been a hit here aboard the Privateer is Run for your life, Candyman! It's basically a VERY twisted version of Candyland...

Tonight, we all sat down to play. In the middle of one turn, I suggested that my roomie make one move, saying "That'd be the intelligent thing to do". Her (priceless) response?

"I'm not known for my intelligence"

Oh, my...

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In other news, the trial my Chapter has been waiting for has been postponed. It was supposed to be next week, but it's been moved to mid-April.

Stop and think about that. The defense got a child abuse case that already has BACA involved moved to the middle of Child Abuse Awareness Month.

Doesn't that just beg for a media circus?

Elections...

Lots of folks are posting stuff about the election. All I have to say is this:


moar humorous pics

Any questions?

Another bit of child-molestation

Found via BMEWS

Arkansas Day Care Teacher Charged With Raping Girl, 4, After Incident Caught on Tape

The meat of the story:

Cesar Monarrez, 18, was a part-time employee at the Royal Children's Academy and had worked there for about three or four months. According to an arrest warrant, the alleged victim told authorities on Feb. 5 how Monarrez had touched her inappropriately.

The girl told police her privates were burning because "Bubba" touched her with a knife inside his pocket, 4029tv.com reports. Police identified Bubba as Monarrez, and investigators said video shows him pushing his hands beneath the girl's waistband while she was asleep.

Ok, hold on: we have a teenage boy working in a daycare? With (basically) unsupervised access to the kids? WTF?

Excuse me while my head explodes.

If Chaucer wasn't already spinning...

We get this from Iowahawk.

Allow me to quote the end of the tale:

98 Of Englande folk, one thynge is certan:

99 Dying by theyr own thousande cuts,

100 The Englande folk are folking nuts.

Absolutely PRICELESS!